Sunday, February 12, 2017

Beating a Dead Horse

Following up on my complaint about KLM's business.

Back when I first contacted the Dutch airline, I'd complained bitterly about their new policy of denying passengers the option of choosing their seats at the time they book their flights unless they pay $20-$25 extra fee per flight segment.  For my trip, this amounted to nearly $100, which I refused to pay.  The response from a customer disservice manager later on was that KLM needs to "become more efficient."  (More efficient at what?  Pleasing the Ferengi?  Driving away previously loyal customers?  I guess they succeeded in this respect.)  I spoke to another passenger travelling next to me -- a tour leader -- whose opinion matched mine and who will take her business elsewhere.  Good job.  The Grand Negus will be pleased.

The other response I got was that I would be able to get online 30 hrs before the flight, and pick my seats then.  I did get online, 29hrs 59mn and more or less 30sec before departure.  I discovered that seats cannot be selected 30hrs ahead of takeoff for flights in or out of the US... one needs to do this not more than 24hrs earlier.  So, there I was, 23hrs 59mn and more or less 30sec before departure... and the option was blocked.  I phoned the Ferengi drone who naturally explained that the day prior to departure, all seat assignment automatically reverts to the airport desk.  The jackass on the phone was quite flippant about this too.  So, the bottom line, getting online 30hrs before takeoff to select seats was a lie.

I also found the flight crew to be pretty bossy.  That's new too.  I was standing with another passenger by one of the exit rows when one of the attending Ferengi pounced on us instantly, ordering us to move along because the passengers in the nearby row payed the Grand Negus extra gold pressed latinum for the leg room.  So, move along we did to the back of the cattle carrier.  Once there, another popped up, telling us to shut the hell up because other passengers wanted to sleep.  Surely,they must have paid the wooden clog-footed, tulip-loving Grand Negus for that benefit too. Done with KLM.  

I've already ruled out most US-based cattle carriers... because they're cattle carriers.  I used to work for one of them so I have a pretty good idea.  I'm sorry to see European-based airlines are becoming this way too.  I think airlines are reinforcing the trend of passengers picking the cheapest possible flights when  the one thing that makes a difference is taken away: good customer service.  On the other hand, there are all those Middle Eastern-based airlines that offer top-notch service.  I may have to boldly go all the way to an emirate and then turn around to get back to France to experience some decent service... either that or just pick the cheapest, stinking, rat-boinking airline. O joy.  I'll probably end up in a Ford Tri-motor, with a seat tucked between chicken coops and bundles of who-knows-what.